(A Very Ranty) Review: The Girl of Fire and Thorns, by Rae Carson

Title: The Girl of Fire and Thorns (Fire and Thorns #1)
Author: Rae Carson
Publication Date: September 20, 2011
Genre: Fantasy

Once a century, one person is chosen for greatness. Elisa is the chosen one.

But she is also the younger of two princesses, the one who has never done anything remarkable. She can't see how she ever will.

Now, on her sixteenth birthday, she has become the secret wife of a handsome and worldly king—a king whose country is in turmoil. A king who needs the chosen one, not a failure of a princess.

And he's not the only one who seeks her. Savage enemies seething with dark magic are hunting her. A daring, determined revolutionary thinks she could be his people's savior. And he looks at her in a way that no man has ever looked at her before. Soon it is not just her life, but her very heart that is at stake.

Elisa could be everything to those who need her most. If the prophecy is fulfilled. If she finds the power deep within herself. If she doesn’t die young.

Most of the chosen do. -Goodreads

1 Star

I have put off this review long enough. It should be telling enough that to this day I preserve a place in my heart that severely abhors this book; it has left that much of an impact on my anger me.

Rant/Review: The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks, by E. Lockhart

Title: The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks
Author: E. Lockhart
Publication Date: March 25, 2008
Genre: Contemporary

Frankie Landau-Banks at age 14:
Debate Club.
Her father’s “bunny rabbit.”
A mildly geeky girl attending a highly competitive boarding school.

Frankie Landau-Banks at age 15:
A knockout figure.
A sharp tongue.
A chip on her shoulder.
And a gorgeous new senior boyfriend: the supremely goofy, word-obsessed Matthew Livingston.

Frankie Landau-Banks, at age 16: 
Possibly a criminal mastermind.

This is the story of how she got that way. 

1 Star

The synopsis should have set off sirens in my head.

From the summary alone, what does this seem like? The story of a Mary Sue obsessed with herself. Oh, goody. *eye roll*

In reality, this was a book about a girl who thinks she's better than the entire female population and spends the majority of her high school career trying to prove herself to guys.

City of Heavenly Fire & Other Rant-y Things

1 STAR FOR YOU.

DNF at page two-hundred or three-hundred and something

Once upon a time there was a twelve-year-old girl who loved reading. She read anything she could get her hands on - but unlike other girls her age, she refused to read Twilight. No, she was far too good for that. Instead, she devoured the Mortal Instruments series, which she believed was far more well-written, more complex than that worthless Twilight.

Fast forward two years later, and Summer is eagerly waiting for the next installment in the series, City of Lost Souls. The previous one wasn't as good as the others, but she believed that this would be the one. To kill the time, Summer browsed a website she recently discovered: Goodreads. Mind you, she did not make an account, but she did spend a considerable amount of time reading reviews of her Favorite Series of All Time.

Review: Time After Time, by Wendy Godding

Title: Time After Time
Author: Wendy Godding
Genre: YA Paranormal/Historical Fiction
Publication Date: April 1, 2014

She has died countless times before, and she is not going to let it happen again.

Abbie Harper dies just before her eighteenth birthday. It has happened before, more times than she can remember — and always at the hands of the same man. Her dreams are plagued with past lives, cut short.

But this latest dream feels different. Her past life as Penelope Broadhurst — an English pastor’s daughter in 1806 — keeps bleeding into her present life in ways both sinister and familiar. As Penelope meets and falls in love with the dashing Heath Lockwood, so too does Abbie meet the brothers Marcus and Rem Knight. One wants to love her; the other to kill her.
Time is running out for Penelope, but as Abbie mourns her inability to change the past, she chases the slim chance to save her future. To survive, she must solve the puzzle of an ancient love story…and Penelope just might be able to help. -Goodreads

1 Star

*Thanks to the publisher for sending me a copy of this book.*

When I see this book:

This book was horrible. It epitomized the word horrible.

Review: Second Star, by Alyssa B. Sheinmel

Title: Second Star
Author: Alyssa B. Sheinmel
Genre: Contemporary
Publication Date: May 13, 2014

A twisty story about love, loss, and lies, this contemporary oceanside adventure is tinged with a touch of dark magic as it follows seventeen-year-old Wendy Darling on a search for her missing surfer brothers. Wendy’s journey leads her to a mysterious hidden cove inhabited by a tribe of young renegade surfers, most of them runaways like her brothers. Wendy is instantly drawn to the cove’s charismatic leader, Pete, but her search also points her toward Pete's nemesis, the drug-dealing Jas. Enigmatic, dangerous, and handsome, Jas pulls Wendy in even as she's falling hard for Pete. A radical reinvention of a classic, Second Star is an irresistible summer romance about two young men who have yet to grow up--and the troubled beauty trapped between them. -Goodreads

1 Star

You'd think a novel set so very locally to me would instantly make it appealing. You'd think.

You'd think a novel with such a compelling blurb would call to me. It did. And boy, was I displeased.

I think I shall dissect that synopsis sentence by false sentence just for the fun of it.

"A twisty story about love, loss, and lies, this contemporary oceanside adventure is tinged with a touch of dark magic as it follows seventeen-year-old Wendy Darling on a search for her missing surfer brothers."

Was there love? No. Was there loss? Only if you count a loss of my precious time. Were there lies? Sure, but I don't see how this helps market the book. There was NO adventure, only whining about everything that can possibly be whined about.

Review: Defy, by Sara B. Larson

A lush and gorgeously written debut, packed with action, intrigue, and a thrilling love triangle.

Alexa Hollen is a fighter. Forced to disguise herself as a boy and serve in the king's army, Alex uses her quick wit and fierce sword-fighting skills to earn a spot on the elite prince's guard. But when a powerful sorcerer sneaks into the palace in the dead of night, even Alex, who is virtually unbeatable, can't prevent him from abducting her, her fellow guard and friend Rylan, and Prince Damian, taking them through the treacherous wilds of the jungle and deep into enemy territory.

The longer Alex is held captive with both Rylan and the prince, the more she realizes that she is not the only one who has been keeping dangerous secrets. And suddenly, after her own secret is revealed, Alex finds herself confronted with two men vying for her heart: the safe and steady Rylan, who has always cared for her, and the dark, intriguing Damian. With hidden foes lurking around every corner, is Alex strong enough to save herself and the kingdom she's sworn to protect?

1 Star

*Thank you Scholastic for sending me this copy via Netgalley.*

Blergh. DNF at 85%.

Review: Sworn to Raise, by Terah Edun

This book and a handful of others are a result of my overly-enthusiastic ARC spree on Netgalley, which I admit I am very guilty of doing a lot. I end up with books I don’t like, and books I have to force myself to read. Lesson of the day? Stop going on Netgalley, no matter how tempting it is.

 

Title: Sworn to Raise
Author: Terah Edun
Genre: Fantasy
Pub. Date: April 10, 2013

Seventeen-year-old Ciardis has grown up in poverty, a cleaner in a small vale on the outskirts of the empire. But beneath her empire’s seemingly idyllic surface lies a hidden secret. Whispers of an inept crown Prince are growing ever louder—intensified by the five year anniversary of the soulbond initiations.

Amidst scandalous whispers, Ciardis finds herself chosen to train for the Companion’s Guild. She leaves her home and sets off on a personal journey to become a Court Companion. A position she’d never thought possible for a lowly servant to obtain, she must prove that she has the skills to attract a Patron.

But she must master those skills quickly. If the legends are true, only Ciardis can harness the power to raise a Prince in an Imperial Court sworn to bring him down.

This sensational series debut melds intricate storylines with remarkable characters and unforgettable magic. Sworn To Raise is ideal for fans of Kristin Cashore, Michelle Sagara, and Maria Snyder. -Goodreads

My Rating: 1 star

Every once in a while we all come across a very mediocre book.

You don't hate them, you don't love them, and they don't really affect your life in any way. You're kind of indifferent to everything that occurs and could care less about any of the characters. You notice the countless flaws, but couldn't be bothered enough to actually list all of them.

Usually, this "meh" feeling is a sigh of amateur writing and under-developed characters. Needless to say, when readers feel this way towards a book, that is a BAAAAAD sign.

From the moment I began reading this, the writing clearly needed work. There were run-on sentences, sentences that made little sense, and sentences that completely ignored the rules of grammar. It was painful to read, to say the least.

AND THE MISPLACED COMMAS OH GOD.

Trudging through this book, I noticed that it lacked the given fundamentals that a reader expects. The plot went all over the place, there was no cohesiveness, and plenty of times I found myself scratching my head out of confusion. The conversations flowed unnaturally. To be put bluntly, it was all quite awkward.

I could go on and on about the numerous problems with this book, (ex: why did she willingly travel with an unknown stranger? Where was the world-building?) but, I don’t believe this series has much hope. It needs a lot more improvement, and by a lot, I mean A LOT. Just read this sentence and you be the judge.

"Inch by inch, it withdrew from the core of his magic like a parasitic water worm being withdrawn from a swollen sore."

....

*barfs*

Review/Rant: Forbidden: Discover the Legend, by Tina Smith

Title: Forbidden: Discover the Legend
Author: Tina Smith
Genre: Paranormal
Pub. Date: July 20, 2012

When Lila unwillingly moves to the country town of Shade, she can’t imagine the life-altering events that lie in wait for her. Shade has a curfew and has always been surrounded by myths. A central feature of the town is its famous statue of Artemis, Goddess of the Hunt, whose spirit is said to protect the innocent.

Lila falls in with a group of intriguing teenagers with luminescent eyes and soon she is drawn into the shadowlands of fantasy and reality, where destiny collides.

A mysterious local girl, Cresida, warns her to stay away, but Lila is drawn to them like a moth to a flame.

Cresida knows their fatal secret and she is honour-bound to protect those who are endangered. But she underestimates Lila’s passion for the mysterious and charismatic clan of youths. Lila begins to feel a call she cannot ignore. Yet her heart is filled with vulnerable desires that begin to turn the underworld upside down, for both hunter and hunted, as she learns they have been waiting for her…

Inspired by the legend of the mythical femme fatale, Wolf Sirens is an intimate tale of unrequited and forbidden love in the underworld, a masterpiece of romance fantasy. -Goodreads

Putting it concisely: This book was a sloppy, horrible mess.

This book leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I have never read something like this before, and not in a good way. I don't want it to seem like I'm hating on Forbidden: Discover the Legend for the hell of it; it truly is this terrible and it's hard for me to conceal my anger towards this.

First and foremost, I want to put it out there that I was only able to bear about 65% of the book; the rest, I skimmed. I rarely skim books, which just displays how much this was a pain to read.

The Writing
The writing was amateur at best, childish at its worst. Filled with run-on sentences, unorganized paragraphs, and spelling and grammatical errors, I felt like I was reading a story written by a 12-year-old. It made the novel a million times harder to follow, in addition to the confusing plot.

Not only that, but Forbidden was jam-packed with unneeded mental questions the narrator/MC was aiming at herself. It got repetitive and tedious. Sometimes, there were paragraphs consisted entirely of mental questions.

C'mon, all these errors shouldn't be done by an author. It's all Writing 101.

Don't believe me? Here are just a few examples:

"I didn't pry further. I hoped as she had the key, that it wasn't stolen and she didn't seem the type. I wondered who had been pissed off enough to have keyed it. I learnt Giny was short for Giane--even though it was the same length, she told me with a laugh." And that is all in one paragraph, might I add.

"Hers were the deepest brightest blue I had ever seen and we weren't in the sun, but they sparkled."

"I was so pale I was green." Uh-huh. I never thought green would be classified as "pale".

Lila- The Main Character
Moving on to the MC with no personality, Lila. Or, if you consider being a snob as having a personality, I guess you could say she has somewhat of a persona. A shallow one, nonetheless.

Anyway, Lila, who the author wasn't bothered enough to have developed, was a judgmental snob. I like to describe her as a hypocrite, since she goes around judging people before she gets to know them and magically knows all their bad qualities-- qualities that she undeniably possessed.

Now, I want to make it clear that I don't have a problem with flawed heroines. In fact, I prefer reading of those than of Mary-Sues. But her. She is a different story altogether, It was downright irksome to have to be in her head for so many pages. That girl gave me a major headache. *takes ibuprofen*

Here's a quote that displays her judgmental self:

"She had a small gap in her front teeth which gave her more character than she appeared to possess before as she smiled widely at me."

Look who's talking about having no character! Besides this being judgmental and hypocritical, it makes no sense whatsoever.

And another great exhibition of her personality:

"As I gazed at him I unfortunately knew then that I found his friend, Sky, far more attractive, but if he was seconds, then I sure couldn't compromise."

So looks are far more important than personality? How could you be so shallow?

Oh, and my favorite:

"I was decidedly more like Giny, maybe slightly looking I supposed, otherwise he would date her, although he wasn't with Lily or Bianca either, and as far as I could tell they weren't otherwise taken. Perhaps I'd underestimated myself and I liked that thought."

Perhaps you are in dire need of a reality check to fix your shallowness, hon.

"The thought of becoming a werewolf appealed to me, not for Reid or the eternal life, or anything- but the possibility that then I would be beautiful enough for Sky."

I sincerely hope that there aren't actually people like this. I really do.

I won't even go into the under-developed supporting characters. I hate all of them. And I hate the plot, too.

Furthermore, why was Artemis even brought up in the Prologue? I'm really curious. It's not like she was mentioned at all in the rest of the book.

In the past, I have only read one other werewolf book prior to this, and that is Shiver by Maggie Steifvater. While Forbidden has nothing on Shiver, I didn't exactly like Steifvater's novel. So, I've learned my lesson. I won't be reading anything by this author, nor anything on werewolves.

1 star